We did not celebrate Valentine’s Day in Serbia when I was growing up. So my first February on the new continent, I strolled through the aisles of the grocery stores in a western suburb of Detroit, and gazed in amazement at the piles of chocolates, pink and red hearts, red roses, and enormous helium balloons. I felt like Bugs Bunny in that cartoon where he imagines he has a weird disease whose symptoms include multicolored dots dancing in front of his eyes. I was dazzled by the exhibit of commercialized romance, wondering where all the pink and red ended up.
I worked at a small family restaurant that Valentine’s Day and a few minutes before closing, a white teddy bear holding a huge red helium heart-shaped balloon appeared at the door. I chuckled and shook my head, amused by the utter silliness of the moment. But the balloon was heading in my direction and I froze when I saw my husband’s bearded face behind it, smiling from ear to ear, his eyes sparkling in anticipation of my mushy and tearful response to this oh-so-very romantic gesture.
Everyone around me was oohing and aahing, and I wished that I could wave my magic wand and disappear; or at least have the teddy bear and the balloon disappear. I should have known that Don would pull something like that. After all, he took me to see Howard the Duck on our first date after I arrived to the U.S. And he was extremely excited when an old Gypsy sold him Huey, Dewey, and Louie wall ornaments silhouetted in wrought iron at the market in my home town in Serbia. I did not have the heart to tell him that I really thought all the kitsch I saw around me was meant for high school kids.
Throughout the years I got accustomed to seeing men in suits and ties logging behind them big red heart-shaped balloons and stuffed animals, bedazzled crimson boxes filled with chocolates too sweet for my taste, and cards brimming with tasteless and sappy poetry. I overcame my cultural shock and learned to accept these funny expressions of affection that came my way on the Day of Love.
I feel pretty domesticated on American soil after more than two decades of domicile. My second marriage is in its terminal and final phase and Valentine’s Day ambushed me this year. It would have snuck by unnoticed had my girls not insisted on making some red velvet cupcakes for their BFFs. I don’t want to infect them with my grumpiness and disdain for this holiday when they are so enthusiastic and eager to offer the world their small share of red, sweet, and chocolatey. It only seemed appropriate for me to let them take the center stage.
Oh, I participated in the madness, too, but in an unorthodox and weird way. My contribution this year is Seville orange marmalade whose seemingly contradictory nuances of flavor perfectly describe my life at present: it is slightly bitter, bright, sweet, and fresh, with a hint of exotic and mysterious. And it is the bitterness that I look forward to, as it seems to only bring out and accentuate the sublime taste of the preserves in all its complexity.
After I take the kids to school in the morning, I make a strong cup of Turkish coffee, spread some good butter on a piece of crusty Tuscan country bread and grab a small jar of marmalade. It has become a ritual I anticipate with glee. I wait patiently as the sweet orange jam slowly oozes from the spoon onto the bread, welcoming the bitterness that lingers for a few seconds. This marmalade is not comforting and mellow. It is bold and assertive. It does not coddle and carress, but most definitely reminds me that life is, indeed. bitter and sweet and exciting and unpredictable.
I don’t know how many teddy bears, chocolate boxes, and big, red, hear-shaped helium ballons are in my future. I’d prefer to avoid them if possible, but even if I see them approaching me from the distance, I won’t be embarrassed and I won’t roll my eyes in disapproval. After all, I know that ther would be someone’s huge smile hiding behind them and that’s all that counts. In the meantime, I’ll bid Valentine’s Day goodbye, with my fingers sticky from the marmalade.
*****
Seville oranges originated in China and Arab explorers brought them to Europe, where they reigned for the next few centuries, before their sweeter cousins took over. The first orange marmalade was made from Seville oranges, as they are high in pectin. Inclement weather made a ship carying them take shelter at the Scottish harbor of Dundee, where a local grocer bought the whole cargo cheaply. His wife used a few sacks of sugar sitting in the store to make marmalade and soon after, they started a jam-making business.
Seville oranges are hard to peel and have too many seeds. Their juice is sour and tart, but abundant, which makes them perfect for juicing, marinades, and dressings, as they are not especially good for eating fresh. Their slightly bumpy skin is fragrant and rich in essential oils, and when zested adds a fresh citrusy punch to a salad, a bowl of wilted greens, or grilled fish.
SEVILLE ORANGE MARMALADE
Ingredients:
- 1 dozenSevilleoranges
- 3 Meyer lemons (mine were from my neighbor’s tree)
- 4 cups water
- 7 cups sugar
Directions:
Prepare the jars and lids. Heat a big pot of water and when it boils, submerge the lids and the jar inside and boil for 5-10 minutes. Invert them on a clean paper towel to dry.
Scrub oranges and lemons and cut them in half. Squeeze the juice and strain it. Reserve the pits, the pulp, and the membranes and tie it in double layer of cheesecloth (this is where all the pectin resides).
Using a grapefruit spoon scrape as much of the white pith as possible, as that’s what makes the marmalade bitter. Cut the skins in thin strips and then in smaller pieces.
Boil the skins for an hour to make them softer and drain. Add the squeezed juice (I had about 3 cups), water, and cheesecloth with pits and pulp.
Heat until it boils, and then turn the heat down to low and simmer for 1 hour. Add the sugar and continue simmering for another hour, until the skin is soft and transluscent. To check if the marmalade is ready, place a small plate in the freezer for 5 minutes. Drip a few drops on it and swirl it around. If it barely moves, it’s done. If it runs, it needs to cook a little bit longer.
Turn the heat off and let it cool slightly. Carefully fill the jars and close the lids tightly. Keep the marmalade in the fridge for a month.
Thanks Robert from Melissa’s Produce for the gift of this beautiful citrus!
Sećam se mog prvog susreta sa tim praznikom. Ništa mi nije bilo jasno kad su deca u razredu počela da razmenjuju čestitke, tipa Be my Valentine. Odnela sam kući hrpu i nisam znala šta da mislim. I kod nas pokušavaju da proguraju taj praznik, da zarade na čokoladama, ali mislim d auspeva samo kod mladih, jako mladih. Džem je divan, a i ja volim te jake, gorkaste i citrusne. Imam jedan od limuna, jedini koji jedem i koji pravim, biće u sledećem Mezze časopisu.
What thoughtful recollections…and what a beautiful marmalade. Thank you for sharing with me. I hope you had a fabulous week, and I hope your weekend brims with good food, laughter, and love.
I am pretty sure your sentiments will ring true with any of us who have lived through that – I remember what an unsettling time it was for me. Life just always felt strange.
Wishing you all the best & lots of hugs. And when the days are dreary, a spot of tea and a warm slice of toast with a comforting spread can be just the thing to provide a boost to one’s spirits – I truly do believe that.
Being half Scottish, I was delighted to learn how marmalade-making came to Scotland! I recently tasted my first Seville orange and was shocked by its bitter taste – now I understand how to use them.
I ignore V-Day as well. The only part that might make me smile is seeing how many candy hearts my kids can stuff in their mouths at one time.
hugs,
Stephanie
Seville orange marmalade is the best….no others even come close! I was lucky to get my mitts on some last year..must keep an eye out this coming season. And it is most definitely the bitterness that is the star of the show
I truly love experiencing life through your eyes. I become more aware, and feel enriched through your journeys. Seville orange marmalade seem to be the perfect metaphor for life in general… bitter and sweet. Both can be savored.
Your beautiful writing is always so lovely Lana, and your freedom to share your thoughts is inspiring. It would be lovely to sit down with you, a cup of Turkish coffee and enjoy the marmalade on a good piece of toast, together.